Smash and Crash

Since it’s the week between Christmas and New Year’s I typically do a mini training camp. You know, run way more then a normal week, rack up a bunch of miles cycling and get back into the pool. Things were going so well. The first few days ran just over 30 miles in four days. The plan was to run between 7.3 and 7.8 miles every day. Ride 2.5-3.5 hours everyday with a minimal TSS of 175 per day. Swim 3-4 times so I wasn’t in horrible shape come January 4th when I was going to start swimming masters.

But the day after Christmas, riding back into town CRASH! I make a right hand turn, didn’t spot the commuter bike riding guy until it was too late. Took the turn a bit wide because there was a bunch of sand in the apex of the turn. Realize that the two old ladies in the car weren’t an issue, and then, only then did I see Mr. Commuter. FuuuuCK Me. I couldn’t get under him so I tried to go in front of him, which in hindsight probably wasn’t the best idea. I don’t think he saw me either, until it was too late. Ha, my sneaky frontal assault campaign on commuter bikes begins! I ended up putting myself broadside to him and got T-Boned. A total fred move, worthy of the best Cat 5 crash video out there. I’m a 4, I’ll probably get downgraded for that one. After many apologies by me and asking him if he is ok, he gets up and says “Wow!, that happened fast”. They always do sir, they always do.

Luckily he was unscratched and damage free. Me on the other hand, well, my ribs hurt. They are rather sore actually. I landed ribs first then hip and tricep. Somehow I have a bruise on the front of my thigh and some scrapes on my what could be washboard abs if I ever did ab work. And some wounded pride. Don’t forget the wounded pride, that hurts the most.

On the other hand, this lead to a scientific discovery. Their is an inverse relationship between the amount of Naproxen I take and the amount of muscle guarding I do. More drugs = less guarding.

What a fitting way to end the calendar year. Here’s to a better 2010!

My Christmas Gift to Triathletes

This Christmas I really struggled what to give to the triathlon world. I can’t give away my good looks, charming personality or laid back demeanor. I’m not able to give my superior driving skills away to others. I give out enough training advice that anymore would actually cause a black hole in the coaching world (which may not be a bad thing necessarily). What to give? What a head scratcher this has turned out to be. But slowly, very slowly I realized what the triathlon world needs, really needs. If only I could take the credit for coming up with this idea. But it’s the thousands of triathletes out there though that inspired this gift. Throngs of triathletes, trying to look cool but failing miserably. Trying to be stylish and at best coming up as a fashion disaster. In particular, two chance sightings of triathletes inspired this. How did I know they were triathletes? How could they not be?

I give to you triathletes around the world a sense of fashion. Not the color coordinated, designer fashion that makes one runway model eligible. Not the let’s match my arm warmers to my leg warmers to my seat color to my wheel logos to my shoes to my jersey and shorts fashion (btw – all the matching – Super Gay). Instead of looking like you got your fashion sense from Garanimals, read on before you go out the door for your next workout.

I’ll give you two of the many inspirational examples I’ve seen.

The first is triathlete out running dude. And yes I realize that when you visit Tucson it may be much warmer then where you came from. It’s not an excuse to violate common fashion sense. I’m running along the Rillito River path. I see what is clearly a triathlete heading toward me. How did I know you ask? It’s simple. A visor (and there is nothing wrong with a visor btw), sunglasses, sleeveless shirt and arm warmers. Yes, he was wearing a sleeveless shirt and arm warmers. It wasn’t even 40F yet. Please whatever you do, for your own sake and the sake of normal triathletes everywhere. DO NOT run in arm warmers and a sleeveless jersey. WTF are you thinking? Seriously? What inspires someone to think its cold out so I’ll run in a shirt with no arms then put something on over my arms. Arm warmers? Really?

Just stop and think before you leave the house. Is it cold? If so, do I need gloves? Do I need a long sleeve or short sleeve shirt. If you put on a tank top and arm warmers you need the long sleeve shirt. Turn around, head back inside, and take off the arm warmers and the sleeveless shirt. Reach into the drawer and grab the long sleeve. It’s that simple. Trust me.

Next scenario. Sleeveless cycling jerseys and tri shorts. Save them for spring and summer, at least the sleeveless jersey, see the next section for the tri shorts. Just because your wife got you a sleeveless jersey and matching tri shorts, doesn’t mean you need to go ride in them in December. Look honey, I loooove my matching kit so much I’m going to ride in it first thing tomorrow! It was under 60F when you were riding. Did you even step outside before you left the house to see if maybe you needed a bit more on? Did you think to turn around after 10 min and grab another layer? No, I guess you didn’t, did you? At first, as I rode up to you on the climb I couldn’t tell if your arms were sunburned or if they were pink from you being that cold. Judging from how goose pimpled your flesh was, I’ll go with option B. Did you see all the other cyclists out on McCains Loop today? Did you even glance at them (and I know you did). What did you see? Lots of shoe covers, arm warmers, leg warmers, gloves and vests. Why do you think that was? Because it was fucking cold that’s why. A little common sense would have saved you a lot of misery. I know why you were riding back and forth on the backside of the loop. You were trying to figure out how you could get back to town without going down a 2-4 mile descent. Whoops, poor planning there eh?

Finally, do not ride in tri shorts, the only exception being if you are actually in a race. They suck for riding. There is a reason no pro cyclist rides in tri shorts, ever, unless they are in a triathlon, and even then it’s 50/50. You want numb balls? Do you like a chafed vaginal area? You want your ass to be sore so when you sit down tomorrow you are reminded of every bump you rode over today? Look, invest in a couple of good pair of cycling shorts. Trust me, this is not the place to pinch pennies.

So my gift to you is a bit of fashion sensibility. Invest in some arm and leg warmers, a vest, booties and gloves for riding. Buy yourself a few long sleeve shirts for running. Don’t go out of your way to match your kit. The first jersey you grab coupled with some black shorts is fine. Finally think about the temperature and conditions outside, then dress accordingly.

Snow

It snowed in Tucson the other day. Not really in Tucson but on Mt. Lemmon. I wonder how far down the snow line is? Tomorrow seems like a nice day to ride up and find out. Hopefully it won’t be like last year where we kept climbing, it kept getting colder and we kept climbing. After 21 miles of climbing, with numb fingers I realized it was 25F and we had to descend. No gloves, no leg warmers and no vest, which really means I started the ride with no brains working. Hopefully tomorrow won’t require 20 miles of climbing to hit the snow line. I’m not sure my legs will be too happy with me. Here is a pic of last January’s climb right before the descent.

about to freeze on the descent

The BAD ASS LUCERO

is for sale, I hate to see it go, but I made an offer on a house and I’m almost optimistic it will be accepted. The less I have to move, the happier I am. Description below:

No bike in the history of man has done what this bike has. Sure there are tons of bikes out there. Stock, neutered, souless bikes. Bikes that succumbed to the sound and fury that this bike is. Bikes that thought they were bad ass only to find out they were at best what an ass drops on the ground. Bikes that brightly colored and cheerful prior to the race, ended up ugly, desecrated, violated, broken shells of their former selves. Maybe you ride one of those? You shouldn’t.

After all, The BAD ASS LUCERO has waged war in 4 countries. Across the US, in 8 different states, this bike has broken the spirit of brands like cervelo and trek. In the EU brands like principia, scott and cannonrail melted under it’s fury. In Canada, where it didn’t even have to put up much of a fight, brands like orbea, kuota and specialized fell before it begging for mercy. But none was delivered. There is no mercy in this bike. In fact it’s filled with souls, souls of all those other bikes who it has belittled and beaten down, souls from the ugly red, blue, grey, orange and yellow bikes that came before it. It’s DEATH. Death to my and now your competitors. it has shown nothing but a desire to slay. A desire to destroy. A desire to entomb within it, all those who dare come before it. It’s the worst that Satan can think of filled with the power of Jesus wielding 10,000 Death Stars pointed at your little planet.

It’s seen and won more battles then any general in history of man. Ghengis Khan would crap in his deer skin pants if this bike came before his army. Sure it’s scratched here and there from it. How could you not be? You can’t fly all over the world picking fights with the biggest bullies on the block without getting dinged here and there (maybe if it only went to Canada, but it went more places then that). It’s armor was never pierced, it’s spirit never damaged, it’s machismo never dinged. Chicks dig scars and this bike will get you laid faster then you could do it on your own in a whore house with $500 cash in your hand.

Can you handle a bike like this? A bike filled with 1000s of souls from those other brands. A bike so battle tested, so victorious that a 1 balled man could have won the TDF had he ridden it this past year. But a 1 balled man isn’t man enough for this bike (although he did hit an olsen twin, sheryl crow and who knows who else so 2 thumbs up for him for that).

Don’t contact me about this bike if you don’t have the balls to look your competitors in the eye and tell them “I’ll come back onto the run course and jog it in with you if you want”. If you can’t tell them they should have “stayed home for the sake of your wife and kids” you probably shouldn’t be riding this bike. (if you are a tall say 5-10 or taller, lean chick go ahead and contact me…NOW).

Do you have the backbone, the balls, the fortitude to be the baddest bad ass on the block? Do you want to possess those things? If so then this bike is for you. If not and you’re still thinking about this bike, go put some vaseline on your oh wait this is a family friendly blog.

So here is what you get. A 1 of a kind 2006 size med BAD ASS LUCERO. With victorious battle scratches on it. It’s black, of course.
cane creek headset
profile 120 stem
2006 DA BB, f&r dérailleurs, brakes
2009 Ultegra cranks and rings 53/39, under 600 miles on them
2009 Ultegra chain under 600 miles on it.
Your manhood, swagger and savageness that you should have had in the first place. (or if you’re a female, the ferocity to destroy the rest your training group while making the dudes nuts shrivel and ascend into their stomach while complimenting you about your beauty and superiority)

$801 shipped.

Leave a message if interested with a way to contact you.

It’s next year

Many people still have not sat down and thought about what needs to be done to go faster in 2010. Do I need to swim more, bike more or run more? Where am I weak compared to my competitors? Do I need more long rides or runs? Maybe I should do more speed work?

Too many people will never answer these questions. Instead they will continue to do the same type of training as they did before. They will wonder why they still can’t run under 1:35 in a half ironman. They will stick with the same program that got them the results they are currently complaining about. Much to a planner’s delight.

Too many will take off the time between now and January. They will run half of what they normally would, which in itself, is half of what they really need. Their bike will sit collecting dust in the garage. Goggles will dry rot from sitting in the trunk for the next 2 months. Their idea of working out is running from the car to the coffee shop.

When their first race rolls around, they will wonder why they got their ass kicked (again) and roll out the excuses. I’ve been slacking on my training (duh, we see your race result), I’m doing base training, I haven’t done any speed work, my long run isn’t up there yet, my build phase starts next week.

Their failure to plan will be your benefit. Their inability to see the long view their demise. They will spend all season playing catch up, only to fall further behind. You can use their strengths to your advantage, while your weaknesses won’t benefit them.

Now compare this to an age group swim team. Their coach plans their season. They don’t take lots of time off transitioning from long course to short course and back to long course swim seasons. They swim 46-48 weeks per year. A week here, two weeks there are their only breaks. Then it’s back into the water. They address things that help them become more efficient early in the season, doing drills, high velocity swimming, working their turns. Making the little things that are crucial to success a habit. They then progress into their training program. Sprinters now train one way, distance swimmers another. Once the championship part of their season rolls around they start tapering. There is no panic about trying to squeeze in this type or that type of workout in. No distress because they have to race in three weeks. The work is done, it’s time to go fast. They don’t hope they have a good race, they just wonder how much faster it will be then early in the season.

2009 was the year where if you wanted an age group Kona slot, suddenly you needed to be 10-15 minutes faster to get that slot. Where elite run times dropped 2-3 minutes over the half distance. Before you could go around 9:30 and give yourself a chance to go to Kona. Now, you are so far out of it, you have to hope the roll down rolls down past the normal roll down roll down. If you are an elite, you used to be able to stay in the top 10 with a 1:22 run. Now all you are doing is counting butts as they pass you by. 53 is the new 55 for the IM swim.

Are you doing the work now to insure success? Are you objectively evaluating yourself, your training and your habits to make yourself a success? A good way to insure failure is to fail to plan. Fail to look at yourself in the mirror. Fail to tell yourself you need to change. Fail to have the balls to actually make those changes.

Now is next year. Now is the time to make the tough decisions about yourself, your life, what you want to accomplish in sport for 2010. Are you starting to do the little things that lead to success? Are you taking a big picture view with your planning? Have you even thought about getting out the door to train this year for next year? Is your rate of change outstripping everyone else’s? Or would you prefer counting people’s butts as they run by?

IMAZ part II

3 in all under 12hrs, all with PBs. Not too shabby. Great job guys!

Tim went 11:02.   Under a previous coach he was a DNF at his IM attempts.  Crossing the finish line, to me, is a PB for him since he has started Ironman races before.  I’m actually looking forward to his progress next season.  He has managed to knock off over 32 minutes from his half IM PB this year dropping that into the low 4:30’s.  I think next year he should be turning some heads around the AZ racing scene with people asking where he came from.  Sorry Tim, I didn’t get any pics of you that my thumb wasn’t in the way.

Jeff went 11:35. He overcame some late season injuries caused by a shoe switch which limited his run mileage during the final build. Jeff has a group of friends that are, or actually were of similar ability in IMs.  To quote one of them, “I’m going to have to put the wife and newborn up for adoption if I want to get close to his time”. When you drop over 65 minutes off your IM PB, you actually just have to de-friend your old ones and go get faster new friends. Or you become King among the commoners.

Jeff telling me what he really thinks

Billy was the third athlete going 10:14.  He went about 30 minutes faster then he ever had.  This was the first time he ever broke 4 hours in the Ironman marathon.  He got off the bike 7th in his AG, within striking distance of a Kona slot, but ultimately finished 14th in his AG.  I’ve know Billy know for over 12 years, train with him often and have been coaching him for just over three. It’s been nice watching him get faster and faster as he does the work season after season. Now at 45, he is faster then when he was 35 or 40!

Starting his 2nd loop

Finishing to a new Ironman PR

IM Florida

It’s barely over and already people are whining about drafting.  Look folks, drafting happens, it’s an accepted practice at all the big IM events. Some people will get dinged sure, but lets face it, those races are semi ITU races for many of the age groupers.

So what should you do if you see a big group?  Catch it or let it catch you.  Thats right, get with the group. Then sit the legal 3 bike lengths distance behind it. I have several power files showing drops of 10-40 watts with .5-2.0 mph increases in speed.  You want to race smart, thats smart racing.  Let some other schmuck do all the work.  Sit back, have a coke, eat a gel and laugh your ass off at everyone else.

You want to go to Kona? Then don’t be a hero trying to break away from the pack.  Ride 3 lengths behind, save your watts for the run and ride way faster then you would have by yourself.  Then, get off the bike and run people down. Accept your Kona slot and be the happiest, smartest racer on the podium.

But I can hear the screaming now.  This violates the spirit of triathlon blah blah and on and on.  Spirit?  Really? When you have 100 people per minute getting out of the water? Thats more then 1 per second.  How the heck are you going to fit that onto a bike course legally?  The spirit of the rule was violated when the race got that big. The RDs and WTC are the biggest hypocrites about it.  NO drafting. 2400 entries. NO drafting. 2400 entries.

Race smart within the rules.

Soma Triathlon

How did Accelerate 3 athletes do at the Soma Half Ironman?  Not too shabby at all I’d say.

2 athletes racing. The final score?

2 half IM PB’s with 2 run PB’s by huge margins.

Tim was 3rd in his Ag, 19th OV and made an ENORMOUS leap forward in his performance slashing 23 minutes off his Half IM PB.  Did I mention he capped it off with a new PB on the run.

Jeff was 151st OV, 2 min faster then he has ever covered the half distance.  He only ran 7 minutes faster then ever before, including a bathroom break.

Those guys rode each of the three laps on the bike faster then the lap before.  Proper pacing = proper racing. I wonder how many athletes did that on the bike then backed it up with PB type runs?  My guess is that these guys had very little company in this category.

Great job guys!

Bittersweet

This weekend the Soma Triathlon takes place.  A big season ending half ironman here in AZ.  Typically THE end of the year race for many triathletes from around the country.  One that pulls in several fast age groupers.  Last year there were ~ 5 states represented in the top 6 age groupers.

Every athlete hates missing races, I’m no exception. It’s a fitting end to my season. One that was either really, really good or really, really bad.  So once again I’ll be heading to a race to watch instead of racing.

The Secret – Exposed

On a few of the tri chat boards yesterday during the IM Hawaii broadcast,  I saw several questions from people looking for what is IT that the pros do to get faster.  It seems that people think there is one thing that they do, one silver bullet that enables them to go so much faster then us mere mortals.  I figure it’s time to expose their secret, share it with the world, level the playing field, even the odds so to speak.  For the first time here is the secret exposed:

They train more, they train faster, they don’t look for the silver bullet.  They do the work, daily in training, so on race day they can reap the benefits of that work and go fast. It’s day after day after day after week after week after month after month after month after well hopefully you get the point.

Yes folks it’s that simple.  Do the work necessary in training, do it often, and the race results will follow.